This is just a rant with occasional pictures of kittens


You know something…Batman never gave up.

Even when things were really bad, when there was neon everywhere, Bat-nipples on the bat suit, and a snow-man spewing temperature related one-liners in Batman and Robin, he sucked it up and kept at it with a positive attitude.

 
This is why everyone should do what Batman does. Anyone can be as fantastic as a blockbuster film starring Gary Oldman and Michael Caine, so long as they don’t lose sight of what’s important.

I recently went out and bumped into a random chap at a bar. He complimented me on how ‘manly’ my shoes looked. I, in turn, told him I was impressed by how much he looked like a bear. We laughed and, because the world around me was starting to get fuzzy and warm, I remained to talk to the stranger.
He came out with many pearls of wisdom. Personal favourites of mine were:

  1. “If you go to France, make sure to drink some beer. Fuck wine.”
  2. “The girls here are all very good-looking. But if they start talking about Twilight, don’t marry them. Or whatever.”
  3. “If you have any personal respect for yourself, you’ll occasionally have to murder a DJ in a nightclub.”

These were all well founded pieces of advice. He clearly didn’t realise precisely how wise, or drunk, he actually was. At the peak of this conversation, he looked at me and said something that stuck:

“No matter what happens, be sure to make the effort to keep friendships. And make new ones. Because when you get old like me, these are the things you will treasure the most.”

…think on that as you look at this picture of a kitten in a fruit basket.


If nothing else, this kitten wants to be your friend. Look at his little kitten face. And his little kitten nose on his little kitten face. And his little kitten nostrils on his little kitten nose on his little kitten face!

After my good friend gave me this sagely advice, he proceeded to tell me that melted cheese on a potato waffle was the best thing he, or indeed anyone, had ever invented. I left the conversation pretty happy and as I was leaving I heard him offer to explain to the bar tender where she was going wrong in life.

That guy seemed down when we started talking first, but was close to singing when I left him. I’ve had days when an enthusiastic “howya” has turned my entire day around. Suddenly it didn’t matter that I was working all weekend, or that the Crystal Maze had rejected my application to be on their show for the fifth consecutive time. I was walkin’ on sunshine, like a freakin’ boss!

I’d say if you were to pick up your phone and went through it now, you’d probably find a fair few people who you used to spend lots of time with, but for some reason, crime fighting duties or whatever, you guys lost touch. Imagine you received one of these texts:

“Hey, remember that time we got drunk and thought we were in the Blair Witch? And we ran through the woods screaming and scared the crap out of all those kids who were camping? That was awesome! I was just wondering, are you still around for that kinda thing??

“There’s a couple on this bus fighting over who was the best character in Streets of Rage. It’s the most amazing thing I’ve seen since that guy told you that you looked like Shannen Doherty and you said your feelings were hurt. I miss you.”

“I know I haven’t actually text you in about a year, but I’m considering ordering a pizza and staying up all night to play Legend of Zelda. I feel that you should be a part of this. Don’t argue.”

If you were to receive any of these texts, it is highly unlikely that it’d elicit a negative response. Even sending a very simple:
“I like hanging out with you <insert smiley face> Wanna get a cup of tea?”

This works fantastically. Even if that person says they’re far too busy, or doesn’t reply, it isn’t a wasted effort. Who wouldn’t like to know that someone out there took the time out of their day to say:
I like you enough to pick you out of all the people I know and give you a call, just to see how you are.”

That’s why Batman gets through his day. You think Alfred hangs around with him because he gets paid?! Those guys are serious bros! Movie marathons, staying up late to watch Lord of the Rings in their pjs, talk about boys they like, etc. Brofistin’ all over the place!

As it is, insecurity is a bitch. People make other people happy all the time. It doesn’t matter how many Achievements you’ve unlocked in Assassins Creed: Brotherhood, or how cool your moustache is. You need to get yourself a bro, holmes…..moustaches do help however.

Naturally there will be times that, no matter what you do, there just doesn’t seem to be anyone around, or they’re just too busy to talk. And that’s life. What did Batman do? He goes out, fights a bit of crime, then comes home to a hot chocolate. He just gets on with it.

Some days go by and every 24 of those crappy hours can suck big crappy donkey balls. Still, if you look at your life from the very beginning up until the moment you’re reading this, you’ll probably find the happier memories float to the surface, and the bad days are difficult to recall.

The last year of my life I spent in my final year of college. Notoriously difficult, lots of assignments, and annoying neighbours that reeked of disappointment. There were a lot of tough days. I’m happy to say that my primary memories of that time are:

  • Going to a gaming convention with a group of friends, in which we played The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy for a solid half hour, totally unable to get past the first level.
  • Trying to come up with a Halloween costume that required the least amount of effort to make.
  • Celebrating the completion of every single assignment by blaring The Twist at full volume, and doing the kind of dance that probably made dancing illegal in Footloose.
  • Making a lasagna that went horribly, horribly wrong.
  • Coming up with, and writing down, 40 original reasons that one of our classmates might be late for a lecture, which included:
    1. Ate a banana for breakfast, which turned out to be FIRE! Suffering from indigestion.
    2. Began an internship with the god of rain.
    3. Drank 100 yakults last night and is now made of solid light.
    4. Discovered she doubled in size with every step she took, is currently rampaging in the city.

The point that needs to be hammered home is that crappy days happen, there’s no avoiding it.
But it’s just one day in an otherwise good life, roll with it, deal with it, until it gets good again.
The good days will always outweigh the bad,
So long as you keep telling yourself so, and so long as there will be people.

And besides…this kitten has a monkey!

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Published in: on November 18, 2011 at 1:43 am  Comments (3)  
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3 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. I’m glad this reached somebody šŸ™‚

  2. this made me cry! happy tears

  3. I like the part where the kitten had a moustache.


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